Thank you for waiting.

I'm going to Vegas (Vegas, baby. Vegas.) next week. I bought my cheapo plane ticket via Travelocity, which was a mistake, because evidently you can just use them to find the cheapest fare and then book directly through the airline. Now I need to move my reservation (and pay God knows what fee) by a day and so I have been on hold for 35 minutes and 31 seconds (there's a little call timer on my ISDN phone).

So far I've spent my time reading bløgs and dreaming up clever remarks to make to the next available customer service representative that has been promised to me every 45 seconds for the past half an hour. Plus, they have absolutely awful hold music which consists of a tinny recording of these same two phrases of classical horns played on an endless loop. Jesus, can't they afford some muzak?

Also, I'm far too fucking polite to these people since I haven't been eating my croissant for the past 37 minutes and 44 seconds for fear that I'll have my mouth full when they finally do answer my call. Screw that. I'm stuffing my face.

Also do they think that a computer voice "apologizing" for the delay is really going to make me feel better? I hate it when people abuse language when they can't think of anything better to do. I've been listening to this infuriating music for 40 minutes and 33 seconds and they keep "apologizing" in the most insufferable manner imaginable. It's like when somebody tells you something awful and all you can do is say "I'm sorry" when it isn't even your fault.

[EDIT] After 1 hour and 6 minutes, Travelocity unceremoniously hung up on me and I lost their lovely hold music forever. I promptly issued a stream of cuss words and elected to call my airline (Song) to change my reservation directly. It took them two minutes 57 seconds to answer the phone with a real person, take my request, get my credit card info and execute the schedule change. I will never ever ever ever use those bastards at Travelocity again.